Thursday, July 23, 2015

Family Support System

Sometimes, we don't think about the emotional support system that we have with our family.  I have a huge family and most of them live within about 45 minutes of my apartment.  My sister and cousin live the farthest away in Manhattan (sister) and New Jersey (cousin), but distance doesn't really affect the support they provide - especially with my sister.  This wasn't something that I really thought about until H's dad and I split up in 2010.  It's something that has been on my mind a lot since losing my job in April.

H's dad and I were together for 14 years and when we split up, I got the strongest emotional lifting up from my immediate family and from my best friend.  The first year, in true Pisces form, I pretty much locked myself away to deal with the pain and feelings of failure that I'm sure plague everyone at the end of a long term relationship - whether it be marriage or not.  I am very fortunate that these wonderful people in my life wouldn't allow me to lock myself away for too long at a time.  I am also fortunate that H's dad and I are good friends now, but that took a couple of years to get to this point.

Since I lost my job, all 3 of my parents, my brother and sister, my "big sister-cousins", and various cousins, aunts and uncles have been incredibly supportive.  They know that in my Pisces nature, I will hide away as I usually do when there is something on my mind that I am trying to deal with but don't really know how.  Sometimes, I wish that I didn't feel the need to hide, but as I get older, I know that it's just part of who I am and am learning to accept that.  My family makes sure that I don't hide away for too long.  They text me or call me to check on me, or say "let's go to lunch - my treat" or "come over and let's sew" (that's from my mom).  The lunch invitations are the best.  I'm always game for free food.

I know that it worries them if I don't call or text or communicate in some way with them regularly.  I talk to my mom at least every other day - often way more than that.  Like several times a day.  I talk to my sister almost everyday, whether it be by text or call or Facebook.  Same with my stepmom.  I talk to Daddy about once a week.

I talk to the elder "big sister-cousin" ("D") nearly everyday and to the younger one  at least once a week.  D and I generally talk very late at night after everyone else is asleep.  She doesn't sleep well and I don't have to get up in the mornings so it works well for both of us. She gives me the "shoring up", as we say, that I need when I need it.

I guess what this rambling means is that I am so thankful for my huge, loving, loud and crazy-ass family.  Without them, I think I would be in a heavily padded room with a long list of medications at Holly Hill.